Tag Archives: #Me

My dynamite.

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At first I thought I was just in love with an idea of who you could be to me, but then I tasted the sweetness of your possibilities and now I know I’m deeply in love with with a few shots of alleged forevers with you.

You know the saying: “Dynamites come in small packages:? That’s you sthandwa sami. My thoughts about you were small like dynamite packaging, but my experiences with you blew me up like dynamites would. You left me longing for more explosions as if destruction was fashionable.

You won my heart, I mean with every feel of your touch on my skin I was invited to your world of possibilities-two minutes adrenalines and all-, with every stroke I lost a piece of me in you and with every kiss… I buried my doubts and promised myself to never dig them up again.

So now I know I’ve always wanted “wholes”of you. Those fantasies were actually cries of a longing heart, the lusting was my souls way of letting me know that my body is ready to feel the weight of your breath.

I now know I’ve never and I’ll never love anyone with the same heart I love you with.

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Another “final” note!

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I’ve always wanted to be the best daughter ever. Trying so hard to correct the mistakes of those who came before me.

…but now I’ve failed. I decided to put my happiness first and in the process I’m about to bring sadness to people who once decided to take a leap of Faith and put their trust in me.

In their eyes I’m a daughter, an angel but to the truth and myself. I’m a monster and I believe I was created for nothing else but to self destruct.

I’ve reached my peak and I’m about to self destruct.
I’m about to chop myself into a million pieces just to remind myself what real pain feels like.

I’m about to shut down the entire system of my existence and call it “Operation Deuses”.

I’m done.

For a change he wanted to read about me.

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He has recently laid eyes on my not-so-cooked blog and decided to scratch his way into knowing more than just a bit about me.

…but then the blog is just a scribble and not entirely about me, so he got nothing.

So he decided to go about the humanely manner of doing such and simply ask about me.

…and he asked a few questions and I’m willing to answer all of them so here goes.

If I was left with one wish in my whole life, I’d actually wish to be granted the opportunity of seeing how my future is going to turn out just to make better choices and change a few things about it.

If I had to spend the last two hours before I have a celebration of my biggest success with people, I’d actually spend it with people who didn’t help me get there. Give them a taste of having me around because they would definitely not be included in my future.

Who am I? Where do I come from with life and where have I been?  What makes me strong, happy and alive?

Well that’s easy… I’m Duduzile Hope Thembilihle Thabethe-Thabede, I’m a person who doesn’t believe in a lot of things but everything I can feel.
I value myself more than anything in the world.
I am still on a journey to finding myself and my purpose in life.

I don’t believe in dreams, but I do believe in making dreams come true.

I can’t say I’ve been anywhere with life because I’ve recently started living but every experience I’ve had in life I’ve treasured for it has made me the person I am today.

What makes me happy is knowing that I’ve managed to a smile on someone’s face and that I continue to make those who root for me proud.
What makes me happy is knowing that I mean the world to someone and I shall always be appreciated and remembered for my efforts.

What makes me strong is enjoying every single moment in life, learning from each and every experience, regretting nothing,  never allowing myself to dwell on the past and always forcing myself to move on.

I only live once,  so waking up a new person every morning is essential.